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Tue, 08 Feb 2005

Today on Pathetic: what Scotland tourism doesn't want you to see.


This came over the digital transom today:
'TARTAN WEEK Mar. 28 - Apr. 11
VisitScotland will host this free public event in Vanderbilt Hall making Grand Central the center of a city-wide celebration of everything Scottish. Visitors will be welcomed into the Scottish Village where they can experience all the wonderful aspects of modern and traditional Scottish life.'

In that spirit, enjoy the following 'wonderful aspects of modern Scottish life": idiot Tories, thieving royals, and resplendent neds. It's done with love, like pulling off a bandage very quickly...

Scotsman Tuesday February 8, 03:00 AM
Senior Tory says Scotland 'not a very attractive place'
A SENIOR London-based Tory yesterday provoked outrage after claiming Scotland was failing to attract new immigrants because it was "not a very attractive place" for people to come to.
Cue the outrage and climb-downs.



Advanced use of twee gibberish in a good cause.
Scotsman, Tuesday February 8, 03:00 AM
MPs allege 'fiddling' in Charles's accounts
' THE Prince of Wales was last night facing unprecedented calls to open up his finances to parliament after MPs suggested the accounts of his multi-million-pound estates were being "fiddled". A string of Labour MPs yesterday savaged Prince Charles's financial managers as they appeared before the Commons public accounts committee to answer questions about the Duchy of Cornwall, the source of the prince's private wealth. One MP accused the prince of being out of touch with his prospective subjects, accusing the heir to the throne of pocketing a lottery-win-sized salary every year from his holdings. The prince received £12 million from the estate last year. The prince's stipend has risen 300 per cent since 1990 according to Alan Williams, Labour MP for Swansea West. "To the public that would look like winning the lottery every year," Mr Williams said. "This looks very much like jiggery-pokery. It looks like you've been doing a bit of fiddling" - Gerry Steinberg, Labour MP for Durham.'

Two comments.
Jiggery-pokery? I thought the royals weren't discussing that sexual harrassment charge.
And Royals not earning their money? That's what royals DO. They're aristocrats. They don't work and they live off the peasants. C'mon fella, we've had fifteen-hundred years to figure that out.



Finally, of more value to society than Tories and Royals: the illustrous Ned.
The Glasgow Survival Guide features a gallery of neds. My favorite? See bottom of gallery four, Weapon of choice: applecorers.
But since there won't be any display ned at Tartan Week, create your own Virtual Ned! (or 'spide', as they're known in Belfast. Gotta love that accent.)

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